Cambodian weddings

Posing for wedding photos

Three is considered a particularly favourable number in Cambodia because of its correlation with the "three jewels" of Buddhism: the Buddha, the Sangha (brotherhood of monks), and the Dhamma (the Buddha's teachings). It should come as no surprise then that Cambodian weddings traditionally last three days and three nights.

I will include here only the main ceremonies that form part of every Cambodian wedding. There are others which families can choose to incorporate: a ritual cleansing, a plea for blessings from the families’ ancestors, and blessings by local monks. As family bonds are extremely important to the Cambodian people, the most significant aspect of all weddings is the joining together of two families.

The ceremonies begin with the groom and his family travelling to the bride’s family’s house to take a time-honoured range of gifts, including foodstuffs like fruits and vegetables, pastries and desserts, amongst other things. Sometimes, this can involve busloads of people travelling to the bride’s homeland but, where the couple lives in the same town, traffic stops as the groom and his entourage process through the streets in all their wedding finery. And finery is the most appropriate word to use here as everyone dresses in their best clothes and the women, in particular, make a dazzling display of flamboyant colour. Tops sparkle with beading and sequins, and the rich, vibrant silks of their ankle-length skirts shimmer as they walk elegantly along.

Above centre is the groom (wearing white and yellow), flanked by his parents

The women in their finery

Glittering fabrics at a local market

The bride and her bridesmaids are also resplendent in gorgeous traditional clothing, often wearing different costumes for each of the three days. As the expense of all this finery quickly mounts up, the costumes are often hired – I remember walking behind a wedding party who had stopped for photographs and seeing the women’s costumes had been pinned together at the back to fit their slender bodies.

The presentation of the dowry is accompanied by traditional songs – in fact, when you live near someone who’s having a wedding, it seems like every single minute of the three days and nights is accompanied by songs, very loud songs that blast out at a multi-decibel deafness-inducing volume on loud speakers designed to disperse the joyful music far and wide. As well as the music, there is often a master of ceremonies, a compere who loves to hear the sound of his own voice and explains every single thing that is happening.

The dowry procession is not the only thing that stops traffic. Inevitably, the bride’s family house is not large enough to contain the hundreds of wedding guests, so a marquee is erected – in the street, if their property isn’t large enough to accommodate it. The marquee itself is every bit as colourful as the guests it contains - lipstick pink is a favourite hue - and the entrance is often decorated with a vivid array of flowers and a sign inscribed with the names of the happy couple.

Brings a whole new meaning to the idea of a drive-in

On day two of the wedding, the hair-cutting ceremony is held. These days the hair cutting is symbolic rather than actual – the bridge and groom wouldn’t have any hair left by the time the master of ceremonies, both sets of parents and all the various relations and friends had snipped off their portions. This ceremony apparently symbolises the beginning of a new start for the newly weds, and is accompanied by blessings and well wishes for their future happiness and prosperity – and more traditional songs.

The pairing ceremony is held on day three. This is where the bride’s and groom’s wrists are literally tied together with special strings by their family members and friends – presumably, ceremonies like this in various cultures are the origin of the saying ‘tying the knot’. And, of course, the knot tying is accompanied by even more traditional songs. 

And then the party begins, with much feasting and drinking and dancing. For the happy couple, the solemn rituals are over, and they can relax and have fun. The amount of fun they have on their wedding night (and for many nights afterwards) becomes apparent nine months later, when their first baby makes an appearance! 

These days, wedding costumes can be a mixture of the traditional and the modern. 

Wats and garudas

Wat Chedei

I have been fascinated by these guys since I visited my first Buddhist temple here in Cambodia almost four years ago. I had no idea what they represented – and from questioning many locals, I can report that most of them don’t know either. Until recently, I just thought of them as decorative roof supporters, and I took photos of them whenever I visited a new wat.

Not all temple buildings have these as it depends on the architectural style, though if the temple building itself doesn’t have them, then other buildings in the wat often do, if only in a stylised form.

Two different designs at Wat Kesararam

Stylised form on the administration building at Wat Bo

They are, in fact, representations of the Garuda, a divine being who appears in both Hindu and Buddhist mythology (garuda is the Sanskrit word for eagle).

Combining characteristics of both birds and humans, the Gardua is usually depicted as having the golden body of a strong man with a white face but an eagle’s beak, he has wings and wears a crown on his head. He often wears winged boots, with toes that resemble an eagle’s claws, and he functions like a Cambodian Atlas, supporting a superstructure.

Garudas can be found in many other forms of Cambodian architecture, often in conjunction with the naga, a seven-headed hooded serpent – more on that in a future blog. 

As you will see from the images here, the depiction of the Garuda motif varies greatly on the local temples, presumably at the whim of the maker.

Wat Bakong (note the different head on the Garuda on the right)

Two slightly different designs at Wat Polangka

A corner cluster at Wat Kong Mouch (with pigeon nest) (and it looks like someone got the measurements wrong!)

Two designs at Wat Preah Enkosa and black garudas on an administration building at Wat Damnak

Another from Wat Kesararam

A plain version at Wat Run and a glorious Garuda at Wat Svay

A much more human-like depiction at Wat Chork

Wat Damnak

I first started exploring Wat Damnak, just across the river from downtown Siem Reap, back in February, when I was taking part in the Giant Puppet Parade workshops and I have visited at least once a week ever since.

Not only is it on a slightly circuitous route to town from where I live, but its Buddhist pagoda, shrines and stupas, its gnarled frangipani trees and beautiful waterlilies, its delightful frogs and darting lizards all make good subjects for my photo-a-day project. 

I also find it a tranquil place to wander and sit – this despite the primary school incorporated inside its extensive grounds, the occasional young man asking for a donation to support some good cause or other, and the constant comings and goings of monks and laypeople.

The central pagoda is currently undergoing internal renovation

This is a living Buddhist monastery with an interesting past. It was a royal palace in the days of King Sisowatch, ruler of Cambodia from 1904 to 1927, hence its name: dam nak is Khmer for palace, and it also served as a Khmer Rouge military depot in the dark days of Cambodia’s recent civil conflict.

Now its biggest claim to fame is its Centre of Khmer Studies, an international NGO whose primary aim is to facilitate global understanding of Cambodia, its history and its culture. The adjacent CKS library is the second biggest public library in the country and its 11,000 publications draw scholars from around the world seeking to research Cambodia’s intriguing past.

The Centre of Khmer Studies

Though I am a book lover through and through, for me the library holds a very different fascination. Running along the front of the building is a long narrow water feature, filled with the most gorgeous varieties of waterlilies and the biggest population of green paddy frogs I have ever seen. The markings on the waterlily blooms, which come in subtle shades of white and cream, pink, blue and lilac, seem infinitely varied, and I return often to photograph them. I am also drawn to the cute little frogs – they actually make be laugh out loud at their frantic panicked leaps, and the comical way they sit and stare goggle-eyed at me. So funny!

The monastery grounds are also home to the Kossamak Nearyroath Institute of Buddhist Studies, a facility to educate monks and the general public in the ways of Buddha, and to a second NGO, the Life and Hope Association Sewing School, which has the wonderfully practical aim of providing young Khmer women with a vocation and a future.

Wat Damnak sits in large park-like grounds, which are well filled with buildings and meeting halls, temples and stupas, as well as a large deep pond, in which sits a bright yellow shrine. The air is sweetly scented with frangipani, the large trees provide welcome shade, and the Khmer architecture mesmerises with its intricate detail. I think you can see why I return again and again to this charming location.